


Sleepover

by Dawniebb



Category: Renegades - Marissa Meyer
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:34:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22897318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dawniebb/pseuds/Dawniebb
Summary: In which Ruby is Danna's gay awakening.
Relationships: Danna Bell | Monarch/Ruby Tucker | Red Assassin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	Sleepover

**Author's Note:**

> Nobody but me asked for this lmao it’s so self-indulgent it hurts X’DDDD
> 
> I have this *cursed* headcanon that Ruby was Danna’s gay awakening.
> 
> Why? bc why not. besides as a bisexual myself i can confirm one can be easily attracted to ruby she’s pretty and badass and kind and omg
> 
> Like I said: NOBODY but me asked for this, but since I was asking for it, I felt like writing it b e c a u s e I c a n and I must admit that was a deliberate abuse of my freedom of speech afgshjagshj. Still, I hope you like it.
> 
> Have a little angst for you little gay hearts uwu
> 
> This is based on “Sleepover” by Hayley Kiyoko. However, I mostly listened to “Watch You Sleep” by Girl in Red while writing it.
> 
> It be like that sometimes, lol.
> 
> Welp here goes nothing

he barely talked about it now, but back then, it hurt like hell.

When she met her, Danna had been confused for some years, but she somehow managed to make it worse. At the time, it wasn’t in a negative way, of course. Something she liked about the trials was that you were standing there watching tons of girls being badass.

And even if she was confused at that moment, she couldn’t help but wonder: Why would anyone not like girls?

Seriously. They were so gorgeous and unique, and powerful and so…themselves.

She started wondering if there was something wrong with her when she realized she couldn’t keep her eyes out of them. Thanks to the internet, TV and, obviously, Captain Chromium and The Dread Warden, she learned that she wasn’t exactly wrong. But that didn’t make her less confused.

Danna didn’t fully embrace the fact that she liked girls until she had the pleasure to meet her, back when they both joined the Sketch Team.

She stood at the center of the Arena, with loose arms at each side of her body, and said her name. And, of course, Genissa Clark (that bitch) immediately asked her to repeat it because she “hadn’t listened.”

“My name’s Ruby Tucker.” She repeated, this time in such a clear voice and volume it gave Danna goosebumps. “Alias Red Assassin.”

It shouldn’t have surprised her that she had such a cool power. After all, she did have a pretty intimidating alias.

Ruby herself was such a powerful entity that, from the very first second she laid her eyes on her, Danna could envision years and years of just staring, feeling and never saying anything because that’s how it was sometimes. Especially when you were gay.

Because when Danna Bell saw Ruby Tucker for the first time, she knew she was gay.

She hoped it just stayed that way. She even planned it, and it was a _perfect_ plan: Ruby would be so, _so_ useful and easy to turn into a weapon that she would end up in the Frostbite Team, where Genissa and her minions would drain her soul and humanity until she was an entitled bitch too. And Danna would despise her. She would be nothing but a memory. The memory of the gorgeous girl who made her realize she was gay.

But, as it was expected on plans like those: everything went wrong since step one.

It would’ve been so easy. There were so many patrol teams and such _low_ possibilities.

And somehow, the stars alligned in a weird way and, out of all the leaders of the teams, Adrian picked her.

Danna was just staring at her, thinking about how gorgeous she was and how dangerous it was for her to develop such an instant crush in a person she didn’t even know yet.

And Adrian, simple as that, went and picked her.

Fucking Adrian picked her.

So Danna burned in the flames of treason.

She kept burning for minutes, and hours and months, because once she found resignation in the fact that she would be in the same team as Ruby Tucker, she still held a little faith inside, that she would _at least_ be a bad person. But, since everything had to turn out wrong (it was the natural law of life), Ruby was the complete opposite of that. In fact, she happened to be one of the nicest and kindest people Danna had ever met. And it hurt. Bad. _Really_ bad. Because now she wasn’t only cool enough to make Danna think twice before speaking to her; Now she was so… wholesome it made her be out of her league. To be honest, Danna didn’t consider herself as a good person.

And again, she thought of that as a positive thing. Maybe her personality was awful enough to keep Ruby away; Maybe they were meant to be colleagues who hated each other and Oscar and Adrian would have to face the facts and limit themselves to hang out with only one of them at a time, but never with both of them, because they knew that if they dared to force them into the same room, soon there would be blood on the floor. That sounded like a pretty good escape plan too.

But of course, just like the first one, this didn’t work either, and Danna and Ruby connected so quickly it almost seemed like the celestial odds were having fun while watching Danna suffer. In a couple of hours, she knew more things about Ruby than she knew about the people she’d met half of her life, just because she was so talkative and so open and so… smooth and so… interesting.

Ruby made her feel so complete, dumb and happy, all at once, that by the time she was coming back home, she felt the butterflies having a wild party in her insides, even though she managed to stay in her human form.

When she was hiding behind the sheets, she tried to come up with at least a couple of more escape plans, but it didn’t take her long to realize that… well.

Maybe she didn’t want to escape from the feeling.

Maybe she wanted to _feel_ even if she didn’t mean to accomplish or even _try_ anything.

And, so, she chose to stay and let things flow, refusing to get rid of what she was feeling.

That was before the feeling got so strong she could barely handle it, of course.

In a moment Danna missed by a blink, a couple of hundred lines were deliberately crossed, and what she thought was only attraction, became a huge crush. And as the issue grew bigger and got out of her hands, she couldn’t help but think: How dare _she_ be so pretty?

Danna liked to see how her freckles moved every time she spoke or laughed, just like she liked to see the determination that made her frown during a fight; She loved to talk to her or just spend time with her; She loved her kindness and how genuine her personality was; Besides, she was naturally pretty, with her pale skin and her hazel eyes. The only thing that wasn’t natural about Ruby was her hair, which was dyed in black and white, but Danna wouldn’t have cared less. Those colors only made her look more gorgeous anyway.

Danna held her hand the first time she got severly hurt during an attack. She heard her scream when the first ruby spike was removed and felt her pain, even though she did nothing but remind her she wasn’t alone… because that’s the only thing Danna could do; She was there the first time someone got away from them, making them fail the mission, and Ruby felt like she weren’t enough although it had been the protocol’s fault; But Ruby was there for her too: She was there the first time Danna got severely hurt, the first time she didn’t feel like enough, the first time she felt alone…

And they were there for each other when there was nothing wrong at all, just haging together and having fun. Sometimes the guys would come along too, and those were the days when Danna would come back home feeling as nothing were missing from her life. Things were perfect the way they were.

But, somehow, her body still threatened to turn into butterflies against her will every time she saw Ruby. So, the first time she suggested to have a “girl’s night”, it was absolutely terrifying and exciting at the same time.

The Tuckers apartment was way too crowded to host a slumber party, so Ruby was the one who came over, and they stayed awake until their minds were numb from all the sugar, junk food and bad horror movies with low budget.

It was almost 2:00 AM when Danna started feeling drunk as hell even though they didn’t even have any alcohol. Her brain started operating in mysterious ways and sent a signal to her limbs. Suddenly, she looked below, and her hand was wrapped between Ruby’s.

For a moment, she felt brave enough to try something ( _anything_ ) but when she discovered a sleepy Ruby giving her a kind of confused look, all Danna felt was fear. And she kept feeling like that even when Ruby held her hand back and asked, calmly:

“What is it? “

 _She didn’t know_ , Danna realized. And for a moment the whole world was hanging from her fingers. She had been given another apportunity to fix the – almost- slip.

And so she did.

“Let me paint your nails before we go to sleep. “ She said.

And even if Ruby was tired enough to not keep her posture straight, she allowed her to do so.

They sat on the carpet at the center of the room, surrounded by several nail polishes and other pieces of makeup they had left on the floor some hours before.

Ruby stared at her as Danna painted her nails, so she tried to frown the least she could. Her right pinky was already covered in a bright red nail polish, when Ruby finally spoke.

“So… do you like anybody? “

Danna’s body went still, and all her motions stopped, just like her heart, which turned into a terrified cube of ice, ready to shatter at the littlest mistake.

“I mean… Like-like” She tried to evade, already moving to the left hand to seem as natural as she could.

“Well, yeah.” Ruby chuckled. “Like-like. Wow-i-wanna-kiss-you-like.”

Danna hissed.

“ _Oh._ That doesn’t sound right.”

“No. I mean, I…” Danna swallowed. “Just… You go first.”

It occurred to her that she hadn’t acted so nervous in front of her before, and Danna hoped she would be distracted enough to avoid noticing it.

Ruby clicked her tongue.

And Danna waited.

And waited.

And waited.

“Lately… I think… that…. Maybe, just _maybe_ …”

And waited.

And waited.

“Maybe I kinda like… uhm… Oscar.”

And just like that the bomb was dropped, and the world that hung from Danna’s fingers fell and shattered right in front of her eyes. And the terrified ice cube she had inside her chest reduced itself to a few drops of water.

And yet, even when her eyes were burning, she stood like the mountain she wasn’t at the moment…and she chuckled like a good, normal, not smitten friend would do in a situation like this.

And for the next 45 minutes, Danna allowed Ruby, her crush, to talk about _her_ crush.

Then she stopped and, interrumpting her own sentence, Ruby yawned. So, bleeding inside, Danna told her:

“Perhaps we should go to sleep.”

Thankfully, she didn’t refuse, and five minutes later they were laid together in Danna’s bed, wrapped in the same blanket, and being the farest they’ve been since they’d met even though they were so close their bodies almost touched.

Danna stared in pain as Ruby played with her own hair while she fell asleep. Then, she asked:

“Wanna see something cool?”

Ruby smiled and nodded. Her eyes half-closed.

Danna reached for the night table and turned on the night light.

Soon, the ceiling was covered in orange, little, fake butterflies that iluminated the dark and reflected into Ruby’s hazel, curious and awed eyes.

And it hurt like _fuck._

“They’re gorgeous.” She said.

Then, Ruby fell asleep next to her, quickly and peacefully. Danna watched her sleep until she couldn’t take it anymore and forced herself to turn around. Ruby’s steady and abscent breaths filled her ears like a melody, and Danna’s insides melted like a candle. Her vision became a blurr, and suddenly there were raining oceans from her eyes.

Danna held tight to a cushion as everything ached. _Everything_. From head to toe.

And when that pain turned into sobs, Danna closed her eyes and dissolved herself into butterfles, hiding between the fake ones in the ceiling.

She wished she could stay there forever.

Sadly, she knew she couldn’t.

-.-

It stopped hurting once Danna recovered from the fall.

She knew it had become platonic (as it should’ve been right from the start… maybe) when she found herself trying to get those two dumbasses to dance together at the Gala, something that happened to be more difficult than it should’ve been because they turned out to be oblivious as fuck.

Yet, when she finally accomplished what she’d been trying to do all night, Danna stared from the distance. There were Oscar and Ruby, slow dancing under the lights.

And that made her feel happy, because _they_ were happy. _Ruby_ and _Oscar_ , her best friends, were happy.

And that was more than enough.

Because, well, it was like that sometimes.

Sometimes… you just had to keep living and support your ex-crush.

Especially when you were gay.


End file.
